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I just felt utterly miserable all day today, and I can't seem to stop thinking of reasons why. Am I a pessimist? Often times, I'm sure my best will never be better or will never be enough. And when I'm looking for an escape, I only end up with more problems than I can handle. When I'm looking for a person to escape to, I only end up deeper than I had planned.
To top it off, I just got home for a math study session with some buddies from class (all guys... as usual), and pretty much, our math study session should be made into an episode of the guy's version of Sex and The City, and I should be removed from the picture (and when I told Rau that, I think he took it as a compliment).
The one thing I look forward to is the little guy who is always happy to see me! He's so funny. Sometimes if he has a toy and you are sitting on the ground, he'll trot over and happily chew on his toy in the comfort of your lap :) Oh and I finally taught him "sit" and "lay" and "roll" but I think he is confused because sometimes I try "sit" or "lay" and he just lays down and rolls over.
Wednesday night, went out to dinner with Winky, Xixi, and Anna to meet Winky's boyfriend Ken, and some friends Anna and Winky had in common. Ummm not the best dinner party I've been to.
Ended up going to the Thanksgiving parade :) Woke real early Thursday kinda grouchy that it was so early, sleepy, cold, and just a few minutes short of a complete shower. But when we arrived, I forgot about all that and the parade was worth every second! My favorite was Captain Underpants:
Probably the first Thanksgiving (unless there was one I couldn't remember) that I've really had! And we had a real fire in the fireplace, which is a big deal to me. From left to right: Tim, Cecily Ayi, Richard, Tracy, Kwang Shushu (I dunno how to spell that), me, Ling Shushu, mom, Gracy Ayi, Alex, and Alex's mom (don't know what to call her expect Ayi).
It might have also been the first time there were that many used dishes in our house at once. Not just dishes from dinner and dessert, but also from the prepping and serving!
Friday morning was, of course, Black Friday shopping. Can't believe some of the deals we got, but we were also e-x-h-a-u-s-t-e-d, especially not catching up on sleep from the night before. Snagged one of these babies as a Christmas present for my mom:
Saturday, I had a very pleasant afternoon meeting up with Tracy for coffee :) Got some new things to think about ;) Saturday night and the rest of Sunday was spent making casseroles, mini-cheesecakes, writing papers, and doing homework (not in that order).
I stole this from an old friend's blog:
Write ten statements, intended for different people. Never tell which one is to who. Just write things you've always wanted to tell people.
1. I want you to know that despite all the drama we've been through and complaining I do, I really value our friendship. Through thick and thin, know that I am here for you and love hearing from you! They (you know who I'm talking about - haha) will come and go, but I think that you and me will always hold true.
2. Growing up with you, I haven't realized until recently how much you have taught me about myself. Even though we are like day and night, I hope that we'll continue to get past all that has happened and continue to grow closer. I know you often become frustrated with me (as I often am with you) but you are still very important to me, and I want to look out for you for all that is to come in your life.
3. You are something else. I wish I had the words to fill the facial expressions I have when I try to say what I mean, but unfortunately, this will have to do. To keep it short and sweet, I enjoy your company and hope that we can see each other every once in awhile (if you can fit me into your busy schedule!)
4. It's amazing to think about the part of your life I have witnessed, and I am so grateful to be a part of it! I know we've been through a lot but I want you to know I'm proud to see have been able to and continue to see you excel and am amazed at how far you've come, always approaching people happily and light-heartedly. I'll never forget the funny times we've had together in the years I've known you - you always know how to make me smile!
5. Dear ____, I love you to bits and pieces, but you often frustrate me when I think you have your priorities wrong. Thanks for all you have done for me in the past, I hope that the future will continue to be a prosperous one for you and that you will be able to straighten out your business.
6. To you: I hope you know I look up to you a lot! Your words and actions always have a great impact on me, and I absorb as much as I can from everything you have taught me. Thank you for being such a great mentor and role model, I think it has, and will, have made a difference in my future to have followed your footsteps using your advice and humor.
7. When I am looking for someone who will brighten my day with cheesy jokes, there you are to make me laugh! I haven't known you for long (and probably won't see you much anymore) but thanks for a good time and a good laugh the mornings I need it :)
8. I wish you and I hadn't grown far apart. I'm sure you know, but I am jealous of your new life that doesn't include me. If I have done/said anything that offended you in the past, I apologize (can we let bygones be bygones?) Maybe soon, we can reconcile and go out for dinner or something.
9. You have always been a reliable person to turn to no matter what. Your endless care, even when we have not talked for awhile, is important to me, and I hope we always keep in touch no matter how far away you are!
10. I miss you!!! I know your life has brought on bigger and better things but I hope that you remember me (I'm always thinking about you) and where your real roots are no matter where else life might take you.
I hope the Pistons pick it up a little! Like the loud guy who sat in front of us said, "Nazr - we didn't bring you here to miss these baskets!" A few pictures from the Pistons/Wizards game (yay, we won this one):
I loooove Thanksgiving parades! Two years ago, I went to a parade with Kyle, Karen, Drew, Danielle, and Ashley all bundled up with our blankets. We woke early for breakfast, got to Detroit, and grabbed a curb that was so close that we were talking to passer-bys in the parade and giving them high fives. Afterwards, I think we went to get coffee and then back home for naps (if I remember correctly we had all hung out the night before until real late too). I really want to go this year but it looks like I'll just be watching it on TV. Or as Josh suggests, on HDTV where the view is clearer, closer, not as cold, and you don't have to wake up really early to watch it. But I don't care, I mean, that's what make it a parade. Picture of the group:
I got up at 7:30 this morning to meet my MIS group at 8:30 at school today. Needless to say, I am in no way a morning person. Or I guess I should say I am in no way a wake up person, because if I have slept a lot the night before (I'm talking about more than the average person's "a lot"), I wake up at any time of that morning just fine.
Well when I got there, late, only 1/4 people in our group had shown up. We talked for 15 minutes before she decided she might as well use the extra time to do something for some class, so she left. This gave me over 2 hours before my first class.
By the time I walked back to my car, I was completely drenched in rain. My crummy shoes that have huge holes in their soles from dragging my feet obviously didn't stop water from soaking my socks when I stepped in puddles either.
We still haven't gotten back our exams in math like she has been promising, our usual Thursday's lunch group scattered, and I'm really drowsy from waking up earlier than usual.
What's funny is, none of this is bothering me. What is really bothering me is I have lists of things in my head that I want to get out. I have lists of things in my head I wish so badly I could sit down and talk to a close someone with a sound mind and sort through. Tempted to call D, it'd only prove to me that I really can't handle things by myself.
Yes, I am definitely in love with this free trial of Thinkmap Visual Thesaurus! But I only get so many free trial words so I must pick and choose carefully...
So useful and helpful! Or should I say accomodative, assistive, adjuvant, practical, or utilitarian :)
Pretty much, I've only come to conclude that I didn't realize until recently how much of a pushover I am.
Today, I was walking from class to my car and I walked up to a stop sign and stopped for a good 10 seconds before I realized I didn't know why I stopped and I didn't know what I was waiting for. Maybe it's because I got that ticket.
I feel like it has been non-stop being at school, booking it to work after school, and spending all my spare time studying, doing homework, catching up with work from work…
This is neat: Descartes says that with the question of whether mind and body are separate, “I” is established because if he can doubt his body, which he does, then there must be an “I” behind all that is doing the doubting (I think therefore I am, I doubt therefore I am). So there must be a mind that is separate from a body.
I know I've already mentioned this, but my Composition class, is such a joke. It's already halfway through the semester, and out of 4 papers and an impromptu essay (all in the class syllabus), our professor has not collected anything except for 3 drafts of the first paper, which we just got back last week. Either at the end of the semester, we will have a ridiculously large amount of papers and homework to do, or we will only turn in 1 or 2 papers that will make up our entire grade. 9/10 times, what we discuss or look at during class is completely irrelevant to anything our papers are supposed to be about.
I'm rebelling by not writing the outline she asked us to write for the 5th paper. Alright, I know this is bad, but common. I've worked hard up until now and it has gone to nothing. I even started and finished a 600 word scholarship essay during one class period. My advisor asked me today during our meeting why I didn't have a grade in that class, and before I finished my sentence explaining nothing has been collected, she said "let me guess... Professor ----" and then she said, "Man I should start counting how many students have told me this."
Annnyway.
This is interesting. A fisherman found a bag of 300 letters that were written to God dating as far back as 1973. I wonder where those people thought the letters went?
Got to catch up with my girly Anna over the weekend :) I can't believe how much things have changed from the days when I practically lived at her house over the summer (was it in 4th grade?) and we played "wedding" and ate homemade chocolate chips every day.
On Sunday, D and I went to Petco to look at puppy stuff and impulsively decided to revive my old, 25 gallon aquarium. It was empty and cleaned out with all the parts (filter, heater, etc.) just piled up inside the aquarium, so we bought new gravel, a water plant, and water conditioner and cleaned it up a little. After we finished everything, we realized the aerator doesn't work anymore. So tomorrow or Thursday, we're going to get airstones, some new fishy, and maybe another plant! Yayyy :) Oh and, Alandra's sister's guppies just muliplied so I might buy some baby guppies off of her too. Alandra said they're so small, they don't even have colors yet so it might be kinda cool to see what colors they grow into if I get some.
Yesterday was a real productive day at work. I feel real good about the fact that employees I work for/with know me well enough to trust me with projects I don't think most interns/co-ops have the privledge of receiving. The APS group at Ricardo is going to a Fuel Cell Seminar in Hawaii at the end of this week, and recently gave me an assignment. Pretty much, it rocks being one of two people who are familiary with InDesign (at least, one of two people in R-US).
We are going to a Home Depot home improvement clinic tonight. Tonight is a window treatment clinic, and hopefully it will give us ideas about a small kitchen window. There's this window in the kitchen that makes me nervous. I know that at night when the kitchen light is on, the people in the condo sub behind us can easily see into our kitchen, especially at us when we're doing dishes or cooking. Hopefully, we'll be able to figure out what type of curtains or curtain patterns we like by the end of the week and have it up and ready.
Starting next Monday, we're going to take puppy training classes with Romeo every week. Although I like to think he is an absolute angel, he has some behavioral problems with play biting (hard), tearing up toilet paper, and barking at the most random sounds. Hopefully this will help us get an idea of what we need to do differently or more.
Ahh gotta go to class - I'll post doggie pics later.
------- (Later) -------
Yep, she didn't collect the outlines today either. She returned a worksheet to us that we completed during class but didn't record points for these either. Grr, I'm going to be so behind next semester when I take the next level of Composition.
