Here's a problem...

I think about whatever is currently bothering me, then I stop and realize it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because no extra people in poverty or no starving children are ever going to be helped or fed because I'm sitting here worrying about something that means nothing, really. It's just excess drama.

But then I never solve anything.

Or on the flip side, I freak out about something that is nothing and think of every possible outcome to try to prepare for anything that might happen. I waste time worrying and then become so shaken from all the worrying that the problem isn't even what's really the problem anymore.

I need to figure out how to balance myself. I also need to figure out what I want/need/don't want/don't need.

The last 3 days have been the most crazy emotional rollercoaster I've been through in forever.

Yesterday while at work, Kyle called to tell me he was leaving today (at 2am) to drive back to KS. So I went to see him in the evening and it was weird for me. Not talking with him or seeing him but packing and hearing about how he's leaving Michigan again. And it felt like the first time he left when we tried to stay together. I don't know why but I started crying and this morning I woke up with puffy eyes again.

I think I have a problem. I think I don't know how to be alone.

GDG, you're a womanizer.

Today on the way to work, while listening to his "Stripped" CD, I realized that almost all of Gavin DeGraw's songs cover every situation you could be in in a relationship.

Belief - defending your relationship through love
I Don't Wanna Be - doing what you can to be yourself
Nice to Meet You Anyway - meeting someone while you're in a relationship
Crush - chasing someone you have a crush on
Just Friends - getting cheated on in a relationship and trying to forgive
Follow Through - commiting to a relationship that's getting started up
More Than Anyone - deep love in a relationship
Meaning - deep love in a relationship and standing up for the other person
Change is Gonna Come - believing there's something better for you out there

Sooo which one are you in?

Oh chariot

("Chariot" - Gavin Degraw, Stripped)

Didn't do much this weekend. Mostly lounged with the pup and today I've got to do some laundry or I'll run out of clean underwear.

I had the weirdest dream yesterday. As always, it was a series of events I fear that will happen in real life.

I dunno why I started this entry, I can't think of much to write. Maybe I'll write later.

I don't wanna get too close...

("Nice to Meet You Anyway" - Gavin DeGraw, Stripped) <--- addicted to this song right now

Wow, I have such a headache. And I'm feeling kind of heartachy.

Up until the moment I sat down at my desk this morning and realized today is our intern lunch day, I've been strangely, thoroughly convinced for the last 24 hours that today is a Wednesday. If our lunch wasn't today, I think I might have finished the week off not knowing what day it was.

21 people were arrested on their way from the UK to the US for liquid bombs. Media says this was Al Queda driven. Anyway, I imagine this whole thing will badly affect Ricardo since the mother company is in the UK and our people are flying back and forth daily. Needless to say, Catherine and I will probably be driving instead of flying to Chicago. I wonder how they got the tip off about the liquids or if security just picked it up or something.

Kinda got a lot going on at work, but it gets repetitive. I'm ready for tomorrow and this weekend.

Oh yeah, I finally "moved in" at work. I have a snack drawer, posted some pictures, comics, important phone extentions, and I've got shelves.

Hey this is kind of funny. Claude sent me to buy this camera a few months back and we were playing around with it. He goes, "This is like one of those picture that girls take when they meet Justin Timberlake and want to take a picture of themselves with him or something." And then he takes this :)And this is Owen. Kind of the typical, geeky IT guy, but he's funny:I decided to take my "comments" section off this blog because I kept getting all these ridiculous spam comments. Besides, I haven't made this blog public yet except for showing a couple of people.

What am I doing this weekend? I don't know. Winky is back in the US so I think I'll have dinner with her. Or maybe I'll just lounge.

Wow I don't I've ever rambled this much in an entry recently. I think I'll stop now.

Fondue me - hahaha :)

Aside from roses and a card, this stud took me out for a romantic evening at The Melting Pot on Sunday for our anniversary :) There are only three in Michigan and I've been begging him for a long time to take me to the one in Troy. But recently, one just opened in Novi. Yvonne and I couldn't even get in without reservations a couple weeks ago.

Here's the cheddar cheese fondue with bread, apples, and assorted veggies...

Here's the Signature Selection cooked with a Bourguignonne (cholesterol free canola oil). This came with yellow squash, broccoli, potatoes, mushrooms, chicken, beef, beef teryaki, fish, shrimp, five sauces (curry, chipotle, teryaki, sour cream & chives, and gargonzola cheese), and two bread coatings (tempura and a thicker sesame seed coating). Ohhh my gosh it was sooo good!